One of the things that I am doing on my break is to meet up with some brothers from Pelita. Although during the catch up, we usually do talk about life in general, there are a few topics or questions that I try to talk through to with them.

One of the questions that I ask is: “Do they have close friends / brothers whom they can trust and talk to if they are facing any difficulties in life?”

Looking at myself (being a worker and a married guy) – I think it’s very easy for us guys to isolate ourselves from the rest. Sure we go to church and bible study weekly – we might even play sports together. But do we care much about other brothers and the flip side of it – do we share our struggles and worries in life with our brothers enough?

I am trying to think through the later. If we are a Church of Jesus Christ which characterized by love – then shouldn’t guys be comfortable sharing their life with (some) brothers? From my observation I don’t think we have that in Pelita, well at least not among the graduate guys.

And I wonder why that is? Is it a problem of trust – do us guys not trust other people? Are brothers not trustworthy? Is it a matter of – “I have a wife / partner now – I don’t really any more friends” – is this a selfish thought? Is it a problem of pride, arrogance and self reliance – “Being a macho man means I can deal with all problems that life throws at me – I really don’t need anyone else to help me”. Are we guys just bad at being open?

Do the married guys have people to talk to if they are having problems in their marriages? When the guys are feeling down or even perhaps having a depression – do they talk about it?

What do you guys think? Is the above true observation of our brothers or is it just me thinking too much?

For me personally, I really thank God that there are guys in Pelita that I really can trust if I need their support and prayers.

I really believe that people are God’s gift for each other and it’s a sad thing if you are a Christian guy at our church and you don’t have anyone whom you can talk to when you are facing problems in your life – find someone – heck talk to me even 🙂