I am having problem with controlling my anger for the past few weeks, if I am not angry I am just really moody.

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It wasn’t intentional but it is quite accidental that I handed in my resignation today – just like 3 years ago when I got that phone call – the darkest day of my life so far.

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Still alive – still follower of Christ – thank God!

Well, it was (and still is) quite stressful during the past few weeks.

Some of the causes are due to my own making, while some of them are externals:

• Matt’s hospitalized for few days, and then the week after Lina was also taken to the hospital – made us very stressful
• Ever since Matt comes back from the hospital – he’s become more difficult. His sleeping pattern has changed for the worse and his cry becomes louder and more frequent. Lina was quite affected by this change – which in turns also affects me as well.
• Studying for SCJP was also a very stressful for me, this is probably a stupid decision that I made. I was thinking to recession-proof myself but boy the amount of preparation needed to pass this exam is unbelievable. I can’t turn back, now that I have paid and booked the exam. Good thing is, I now be able to put this more in perspective, I’ll do my best, if I pass I pass, if I have time to study I will, if not I don’t want to be overly stressed about it.
• Bible study, I am supposed to be co-leader of this group, but I can’t even make it to the bible study consistently. And if even I was present, I couldn’t help the leader whenever we had heated discussions, personality clash, difficult questions etc2. I am just so frustrated, I just wrote an email basically suggesting that I should remove myself from this position.

I know it will get better. I am looking forward for the end of May, when I finished my exam.

I love my current unit, however it does feel a little bit cramped with stuffs. Few things on why this on why this is the case:

• I don’t have time to organize
• I am not a good organizer
• We simply own too much stuffs

However I really love tidiness and the current untidiness does actually cause some stress to me (and Lina as well). So one of my goals this year is to make our nest more organized and less cluttered.

Few things that will help achieving that goal:

• Throw away junks – things that hold sentimental value but not really useful anymore
• Give away things that might be of some use to others but not to us (example: old clothings, some piece of furnitures)
• I am thinking of getting some shelves.
• Need to stop accumulating junks, buying stuffs that I don’t really need.

The kids corner

This is the corner where we put the kids’ toys (well mostly Jet’s at the moment). We put the toys in several boxes. We also have an aquarium that function as a storage box now.

I did some tidy up on this corner, since we have a few visitors coming, it looks a little better but there’s still a lot more room for improvement.

The book shelf

I think I need another one or two book shelves. And then re-organize the things again.

The shoes rack

The bottom tier is actually broken as sometimes we put heavy stuffs on top of this rack. Also this 2 tiers rack is no longer enough to hold our footwear. Not to mention Matthew would also have his own footwear too later on.

Others

My study room (soon to be Matthew’s room as well) is also quite messy, but I have no pictures to show it.